Horoscope.

Decided to surf randomly for stuff today and guess what I found - my chinese horoscope for today.

Profit by this planetary calm to return upon yourself by asking yourself such questions of capital importance as: have I given a sense to my life? Am I not spreading myself thin instead of concentrating myself on the essential? Am I living actually or only vegetating?
- from Asia1.com.sg

How apt. Am I actually living, or am I merely vegetating?

I need to join another society, really.

Phases.

I call it the Supertramp phase of music - sooner or later someone (or some group) like Mika or Scissor Sisters will come out, with his/their cartoon-ish music and lyrics that are so fun to dance to, yet so deceptively subversive.

Mmm... I like.

Spinal Column of the Chicken.

I had a quarter of a (whole) roast chicken left from 2 days before so I decided to make full use of it and make some traditional Chinese herbal chicken soup. (ie throw the remains of the cooked chicken and some herbs and let it stew [at your inattention to it] for a few hours.)
I'm currently eating it with rice (tastes alright btw, with all the marrow and fat and assorted innards) and I've just discovered two very interesting pieces of bone.

Now those of us taking medicine or the health sciences will no doubt be thrilled to find the practical applications of what we're studying. IE You can separate individual pieces of vertebrae by boiling them long enough.

No seriously, I am quite perturbed at the fact that I used to be able to enjoy my chicken soup without noticing assorted pieces of odd-looking bone, but now my eyes seem to be attuned to the sight of anything vaguely resembling structures in the human body.

On a side note, it is just amazing how animals have similar systems to ours? (Don't get me started on the creation vs evolution theory, you know where I stand, by the side of Mr Charles Darwin) I mean, looking at this, there isn't any wonder why our ancestors used to believe (and perhaps still do) in consuming animal innards to re-invigorate our organs, and fabricated (or not) tales of Frankenstein-ish creatures which had various entrails and sensory apparatus replaced by some unlucky animals' parts?

Isn't it fascinating, and shouldn't we be encouraged, by the fact that we haven't lost our sense of bewilderment in this cynical world of ours? That we don't take things for granted?

Rabbits in hats, let's hope we don't become.

Getting Old(er).

Hands up those who still buy CDs instead of the latest songs/albums from iTunes/Soundbuzz (or just download it from somewhere, anywhere.)

Shout "Yeah" if you don't understand the latest furore about Vista. (Yes I mean the interface.)

And nod if you still remember Christina and Britney both being fresh-faced teens and Charlotte Church an innocent little girl with an angelic voice.

Laugh (wistfully) if you don't know where the latter has ended up right now.

We're getting old, face it. We need to get in touch with the juice, man, the juice! The bling! The latest-name-for-US-dollars!

Yeah right.

Incriminating Evidence.

To my dear friends and readers of this blog:

Please do clear your browsing history sometimes. I have records of a kind friend who has visited this site 57 times in the past year - it is certainly gratifying to know that I have people who care about me, but at the same time, I really worry about your personal web security. There are far too many websites which have tracking cookies much more malicious than mine - so please do clear your cache (in IE it's under 'tools, internet options, clear history/cookies'*) periodically.

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*I'm not providing instructions for the good people amongst us using firefox, opera or safari. I assume you do know a little bit about internet security if you're not using IE 5. Or 6.

Mac VS Windows.

I've been reading quite fervently about the latest incarnation of windows lately, and the associated mac vs pc arguments that never seem to end. (Oh 'cause I'm planning to buy a new laptop this June.)
I think, swimming past the incessant mac-is-better fanatics and oh-we-are-better-microsoft devotees and their verbal duels, I've sorta reached a personal epiphany.

Apple will never win Microsoft in the battle of the OSs - if certain conditions don't change.

1. Compatability. Yes this may sound counter-intuitive, but have you ever thought of this? The Mac OS X is built specifically for the Mac, while Windows runs on all PCs and laptops. I'm not talking about compatability with older hardware in Vista (current furore is on that), I'm talking about Windows being a platform for the many different brands of PCs that you can find in the market today. If Apple doesn't develop a PC-friendly OS in the future, there is simply no way it can compete with Microsoft in terms of market share - for it is but one company, compared to the many that manufacture PCs and laptops.
Now I know pure Mac fanatics will be seething or feel revolted at the tiniest thought that the OS be corrupted and exported to a PC (and I know of at least 3 mac users who read this blog) so I beg you to think of this - as fancy, simple and stable as Tiger is, how do you expect people to convert when Apple jealously guards its operating system and restricts it to just Macs?
I mean, the whole company is built around the idea of having total integration - you buy the hardware, software, everything bundled as one (so you don't have to worry) - which is good, but for the simple testosterone-charged student who wants to brag "I have the latest IBM model with extra-wide screen and 2 gig ram, not like your 2ghz Dell dinosaur which only has 512mb ram" it just doesn't work, does it?
For a Mac is a Mac is a Mac. Or if you start being snobbish about your latest Mac to other Mac devotees you're running contrary to the values of owning a Mac anyways. Being helpful, having a sense of cammaderie, and stuff.

2. The lack of games for the Mac. Seriously, you can read on and on about parallel games just as exciting, just as wonderful (alternative versions of Windows games, if you like), but the simple point is - there is still a lack of games that run on Tiger. There might be an increasing number of games developers that are catering for both Mac and Windows users, but honestly, far too many hardware-consuming games (such as First Person Shooters) are still designed for PC-based hardware.
And I'd like to digress here, really. I've been reading so much about running Windows using bootcamp (it's a Mac program) on a Mac to play games, and supposely it works just fine - but don't you find it ironic, that you have to install something you condemn (I have to admit, it's a stereotype, the typical Mac user condemning everything Windows-based) despite all its flaws, that you'd tried hard to avoid in the first place?
But anyways getting back to the main point. Talking about OS - and OS alone, Tiger, not the Mac as a product - it just doesn't have enough clout to convince gamers that their violent needs will still be satisfied if they switch to Tiger.

So I have to say, unless Apple manages to persuade many, many more citizens and developers to use its software, I would probably remain the casual yay-I-can-protect-my-own-privacy-well-most-of-it compulsive gamer who brags (sometimes) about his PC-specific computer knowledge. Who would not switch to Vista just yet, of course.

World Domination.

I want to dominate the world. By subjecting everyone to this mysterious illness where you lose control of your thoughts, all conscious rational behaviour, and can only direct your thoughts towards the next sweet thing you can do for your family, other half and all those around you.

This illness called love.

Yes I want to dominate the world.

Blue.

From a song (Blue by Euphoria) - 'I used to be able to do everything myself, now I need a little help; I used to do everything I wanted on my own, now I don't want to be alone.'

I don't know whether this is a blessing, curse, or a little of both.

I am so f***ed.

War

Everyone thinks they know what to say
Everyone thinks they know what to do
War is bad, war is terrible
War is the curse that brands us all
But they don't know what you feel
All your true emotions unspoken
Like a true soldier,
A true soldier.

What's the point of it all
You wonder
as you see your brothers die
Fighting the enemy,
You know they are thinking
But the same.
Oh you don't know it all,
Like a true soldier,
A true soldier.


Just felt like writing something that's been bothering me. Been sick with GE (gastroenteritis) last night and today and the stomach spasms have been terrible, hence am taking the time to do something enjoyable whilst I still can (while the medication lasts).

Chocoholism Pt 3.

Dear readers,

I am sorry to inform you that alas, I have succumbed to my temptations.
I ask humbly for forgiveness from those (Mei that's you) who would not get a taste of this delectable delight because of my weakness, my ill-discipline and my inability to keep my mouth shut appropriately.

I promise to buy you more genuine hand-made chocolates from this country.
And not to eat all of them.

Chocoholism Pt 2.

Chocolate.....

I need chocolate....

This post is dedicated to all the chocolate lovers out there - I am with you!

As the stars need the moon, so I need you -
With all the breath I take, so I think of you!

OK I am getting delirious.

Chocoholism

I just realised how much of a chocoholic I am now when I discovered, to my greatest horror, that I had run out of chocolates. That was like two minutes ago, when I started tearing (not crying) and sniffing uncontrollably, felt like I would really be able to rob a poor kid of his chocolate and send him to his mum to cry, and then rob him again of that precious stuff when his mum tries to placate him by buying more.
Yup.
And then I saw the chocolates I had bought for friends and relatives back home.
No I haven't succumbed to that temptation yet. But it looks more tempting by the minute - that stash of emergency medicine looks ever so sweet, ever so melt-in-your-mouth-chockful-of-goodness-whatever-cliche-you-can-think-of alluring!
Will keep you updated on my withdrawal symptoms as they come along, later.

Scars.

I realise my tattoo has now taken on another additional meaning - it now serves to remind me of a period in my life where I was quite a different person. Subtle changes, you might think - but indelible ones in my caffeine-charged conscious-craving over-loaded brain right now.
Coupled with that song Edwin sent me years ago (Scars - by Papa Roach)... my mind's gone into overdrive.
Yeah, some songs just take on that particular meaning you want them to; the simple act of sharing a song sometimes can mean so much, to those who believe in the value and power of music.

Our time.

I was just surfing through my music library when I came across the Forrest Gump soundtrack album hidden amidst my other songs. Now I didn't take note before that it actually contains quite a few 'iconic' songs from the 60s and 70s. So yup. Led me to recollect about the movie - what it was about, when I saw it, etc. Could only remember these 'snapshots' where my parents had rented the Laser Disc (yup it was that long ago) and were watching it intently, while I actually watched only scenes of it, having been pre-occupied by the computer (yep not that long ago) and being called downstairs to forcibly watch 'cause it was 'meaningful'.
Now the point is, thinking back, did it not contain so many scenes that my parents would have been familiar with? Apart from the running with the old Nike shoes of course (the epitome of their struggle through life; never stop running, life's a marathon, etc - which happens to be one of my father's favourite quotes, and which I happen to believe in as well), or the chocolate scene (yep that chocolate quote never fails to come to mind does it), but I mean more like the whole movie, the setting, the story, everything. I don't recall many other films specifically made for that target audience - do you?

Which led me to think, of course. What would go into a movie for our generation? More specifically - those born in the '80s? Going beyond the casual(or not?) mention of the various wars America fought for 'freedom' and 'democracy', what would be a common theme that would resonate with everyone our age?

What do you think?

Leaking Leaks.

So I've been following the news more frequently than I have for the past few months. The trial of 'Scooter' Libby has particularly interested me - it's got the classic elements of betrayal, suspense, shocking revelations and all that is required of a riveting court case you don't often get to see today. (Corporate trials, however shocking the accusations, always end up in legal mumble jumble, don't you think - but that's another story)

So anyways. I'd just encourage you to follow it, for it's probably gonna make several headlines in our time, and if the victors have (or don't have) their way - a Hollywood movie decades down the road.

Oh and personal comment - I think Pampers can make an interesting advert based on this, don't you?

Missing Home.

Perhaps it's the dreadful weather, perhaps it's the horrible exam I just had, or perhaps it's the guilt I feel for not having done enough work throughout the term.

Or perhaps you just don't need any reason to miss home.

Reminiscing.

Reminiscing about the old times, you often wonder why you've made the choices you could have avoided over the years - all those mistakes, all those painful temptations you've succumbed to, all those falls you could have recovered from; all the wonderful moments you've enjoyed, despite everything that should have brought you down.

It's all in the perspective you have, isn't it?

Remembering the Past.

So sometimes, you wonder why you've chosen this path you've taken.
You wonder why you've done all that you have, so far, with no concrete results to show but for the fat you've accumulated from eating far too many chocolate cookies.
You start to doubt yourself, your ability to get out of this hole you've been digging subconciously with your lack of attention to your work and everything else.

So what do you do?
You remind yourself of what it is you're doing all this for. You dive into blogs of friends, strangers, who seem to have a grip on themselves. You read your own posts, or your diary, for all that you've written, and believed in, not that long ago.
Or you just reflect. Refresh those neuronal connections you've made throughout your years of living. Think of your family and friends - how they would react when they see you in this state, and how lucky you are to be free from their clutches.
Go out with your current friends, if you're the sociable sort, or sit down in a nice cafe, and people-watch.
Drink some mocha, for the chocolate relaxes you and the coffee invigorates you.
And listen to your favourite music - whichever helps, and has helped you, before.

Or discard all that I've just written, for it's for me, and me alone, and do what works for you.

And do wear sunscreen.

Thanks Sam.

The Veggie Cafe

Just felt like gushing about this cafe in the University, really.

It's located just outside the John Rylands University Library, for those who are studying here but do not yet know of its existence. There's a billboard outside advertising its opening hours - but I wonder how enticing the words "Veggie Cafe" can be to anyone entering the library. Or perhaps it's aimed more at the people who come out of the library after several exhausting brain-busting hours at work.

So it's a quaint little cafe. Once you enter the building and descend down a flight of stairs you'll notice how it's so different here - the lighting and heating is good, the tables are spread out in neat rows, and your phone loses its reception remarkably. Oh did I mention the serenity of it all, with some radio music in the background and a general quiet buzz emanating from the place? It just feels like you've been transported back 20 years or something, when people still returned their plates when they finished with their meals (not that the staff wouldn't clear them), the people running the place are there monday-friday, and they talk in that oh-so-beautiful english accent (just right, not that thick Northern accent where you can't decipher anything other than "yes" and "now"), replete with smiles and all. You genuinely feel they are nice people who are just running the cafe for the fun of it, not the profit-driven sort who'd smile only as they're tightly grasping the notes you've barely taken out of your wallet.

And did I mention the food? Yup I am a self-confessed carnivore who likes his meat fresh and bloody, but somehow, I can't help but enjoy the veggie soups they dish up, day after day (well at least the days I'm there). Carrot & coriander; peas and mint; lentil and some other bean; mushrooms; tomato and something that I can't discern but just tastes nice... It's just good natural food, I have to admit. I mean, this is probably one of the rare few places where I don't mind subjecting myself to the torture of not having meat for an entire meal.

And the prices are quite reasonable. A soup + bread and coffee costs just 3 pounds - compared to a subway meal of 4.80 or that spicy wings and coke. Oh and of course do compare it to the not-quite-curry at the refractory just a few steps away, that costs 30p more but tastes infinitely worse, and you get my drift.

So yep. Do pop by one day. But oh be warned. I brought two freshers there one lunchtime and one of them was like, "no meat! so ex somemore!" and seemed quite perturbed by what he was eating (an egg mayo baguette, which admittedly didn't look that nice). So yeah. Go into it with an open mind (you have been warned, it is a veggie cafe and makes no pretense about it) and you just might be rewarded.

Damn.

In one of those moods again. Where you feel nothing is going right in the world, where you start to doubt the decisions you have made thus far, where you just feel generally like the tomato that's been in your malfunctioning fridge for three weeks?

When even a 3/4 tub of ben & jerry's chocolate fudge brownie ice-cream doesn't help. When listening to happy songs like the yeah yeah yeah song doesn't soothe your wandering mind. When chatting to the people you hold dear to your heart doesn't dull the aching pain in your pre-frontal cortex.

I guess it is times like these that I look at my alcohol collection on my shelf and the absolut looks so, so enticing.

And of course am reminded of the time I tried Absolut Citron thinking it would taste remotely like lemon, and discovered to the horror of my cranial nerves that it tasted exactly like its cousin in the science lab in secondary school.

So no I'm not about to drink to drown my sorrows. Probably going to sleep now, and hopefully it'll be a good day.

Good day to you my friends.